Hi there,

Your parents or carers separating or getting divorced can mean you’ll have to change where you stay. It’s natural to have a view on where you’d like to live, and it’s okay to want to stay where you feel most comfortable and supported. Everyone deserves to feel safe and cared for, especially at home.

Children and young people always deserve to have a say in where they live, especially when they’re old enough to understand what’s happening. If you’re over 16, you can choose where you live unless a court order says otherwise. When you’re under 16, your parents usually have the right to decide where’s best for you to stay.

Sometimes a court will be involved and will decide where and who you stay with. They should always listen to your opinions, and they’ll make the final decision if there’s a disagreement between your parents or carers.

Expressing what you want can be difficult, but it’s an important way to make sure you feel comfortable. It can help to think about whether you’d want to talk to your mum or dad first to find out what’s possible and say what’s happening.

Talking to your dad about this might feel difficult, you could try writing down how you feel, either in a letter or a text. It might help you find the words. It can help to think about whether you would like to keep seeing him, and ways you could keep doing that.

Sometimes it can help to get support from someone outside of the situation. You could get advice or moral support from a trusted adult at school, college, or a family member. Remember, you can always get support from Childline.

Remember, you always deserve to feel happy and heard.

Take care,

Sam