Ask Sam Letter

Childline Avatars_1_Default.jpg

To Sam

Mum is cheating but can’t be sure of it | Ask Sam

Hi Sam,

for the past two or so months my mother has been behaving really suspicious like going out and staying at “friends” houses and has been caught lying to my dad about going out with her friend and its been carrying a lot of tension in the household. earlier last year divorce was been discussed but it never went through and i thought it would get better from here but i saw my mum around a month ago get of the bus with this random man and run of together and i told my dad and she said “a friend from work was on her bus”. Shes becoming more distant and its clearly affecting my dad who already has vaping problems due to stress and i am feeling caught up with many emotions. have you got ideas on how to find out whats going on and to remain mature? i would appreciate if you reply because i am getting overwhelmed by the day! thanks ❤️

Childline Avatars_1_Ask Sam.jpg

Sam

Hi there,

Lots of young people can feel stuck between their parents or carers when they’re having disagreements. It can feel hard if you feel like you need to take sides or you don’t like what someone has done. It’s understandable that you’re feeling overwhelmed.

Remember, what your parents or carers do isn’t your fault. You’re never to blame if they’re having disagreements or talk about separating. It’s not your responsibility to find out what your mum is doing, but it’s okay to want to have answers for yourself.

It can help to remember that how you’re doing is important in all of this. It’s okay to share with your mum how you’re feeling about what’s happening, or to say if you’re worried about the things she’s doing. You can’t control how other people will react, but sharing what things are like for you can help you to feel less burdened. It might help to think about writing things down for your mum, with questions you’d like to ask. You could then share how you’re feeling without having to say things out loud.

Taking care of yourself is really important. When things are happening at home, it can sometimes feel like you can’t get a break. Think about the things you enjoy doing in or outside the house. It could help to plan time and space for yourself to do something you enjoy away from your parents.

Remember, you’re not alone. Childline is here to support you through anything that’s happening. You could get in contact with a Childline counsellor. Whatever’s happening, we’re here for you.

Take care,

Sam

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter