Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Terrified of childbirth (16 and pregnant)

hi sam i am 16 and am 7 months pregnant with triplets 2 girls 1 boy i am terrified of going through labor especially as in my family its tradition for a natural home birth. i have asked everyone how bad it is and ive been told its unbearable what do i do to get through it its going to be so painful..please read and respond sam

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Giving birth can feel scary and you might have heard different things about what to expect. Everyone’s experience of childbirth is different and it’s natural to feel scared about labour.

Relatives and friends sometimes have lots of suggestions about what you should do, like where to give birth and what pain relief to use, but it’s your choice to do what’s best for you. Having twins or triplets might be a new experience for everyone and your midwife is there to answer questions and support you through your pregnancy.

Only you know what is the right choice for you and it’s good to look at all of your options with your midwife and to write a birth plan. It’s not always possible to have a home birth and your midwife will tell you whether it’s possible for you. Any decisions about where you have your baby will be made to keep you safe and should always be discussed with you.

A few months before you are due to give birth you can attend antenatal classes. Usually you’ll be invited to a class so ask your doctor or midwife if you haven’t heard about them. Most classes are for a few hours in either the evening or daytime each week for 2 to 4 weeks. You might be invited to a class earlier on in your pregnancy if you’re expecting more than one baby as they might be born earlier

Someone can go to the classes with you. Usually this is the person who will be with you at the birth. It’s up to you who you choose to be your birthing partner and you might want to pick your partner, the father of the baby, your mum, a friend or your aunt for example. Remember: their role is to support you and help you feel comfortable

The classes will help you feel more prepared. You can ask questions and talk about your feelings with other new parents. The class leader will tell you about your choices for pain relief and where to give birth. Sometimes they’ll take the group to see the delivery suite in your local hospital so it’s familiar if that’s where you decide to go.

As your due date, the date your baby or babies are expected, gets closer you will see your midwife more regularly so hopefully you’ll have the chance to ask anything that you may have forgotten earlier on.

It’s important you get support after the birth too and you’ll need more help if you’re having twins or triplets. Being a young parent can also mean you need extra support: this might be financial help or help with childcare so you can carry on with your studies if you haven’t finished school yet. Sure Start centres give help and advice on child and family health, parenting, money, training and employment

Remember that support and information is available so that you feel confident and ready for becoming a parent. You can talk about anything that’s worrying you with one of the counsellors at Childline too.

Thank you for your letter and take care


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