Hi, my friends keep falling out with each other on Snapchat. Do you have any advice about not getting drawn into the drama?
Hi there,
Even the best of friends can sometimes fall out with each other from time to time. It's normal to have small arguments or to get on each other's nerves, but if it's happening a lot then it might be a sign of something deeper.
There are lots of benefits to keeping in touch with your friends on social media apps like Snapchat, Kik and Instagram - it's been useful during the pandemic or other times when people can’t meet up in person. There are some problems with only talking to friends online though, misunderstandings can easily happen, especially if it's just by chat and not video or voice calls.
Talking in text can sometimes make it easier for people to be mean to each other and to say things they wouldn't say in person. It can make it feel like there's more of a gap between what we say and what we feel. It can also be a lot harder to understand someone's tone and meaning when chatting online. You have to work a lot harder to make yourself understood, and all these things combined can sometimes cause people to fall out.
A good way of not getting involved in any social media drama is to try and encourage people to meet in person, where it's safe and possible, or to at least talk in a group call or video chat. This helps people to remember that everyone there is a real person and what they say has consequences. This might not always be possible, but if people see each other in person more often, it can help stop drama before it happens.
If drama does happen, it's okay to just not get involved. One of the good things about group chats is you don't have to respond to anything you don't want to. You can also still talk to people individually if you want to, without having to reply in the main chat. By not getting involved you can let people know you're uncomfortable with drama and won't be taking any sides.
I hope this has helped, thanks for writing to me. If you wanted to talk about the specific problems your friends are having then Childline counsellors are there to listen. You can also share your feelings with other young people on the Childline message boards.
Take care.
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
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