Ask Sam letter

Hi P,

Thanks so much for sharing what you’re going through. You sound as though you’re going through a difficult time and it’s really good that you’ve felt able to write about what’s happening. You seem as though you’ve been having a lot of mixed emotions lately and you described how some days you’ll feel good and other days you’ll feel worried and broody. Feelings and emotions can be hard to understand sometimes, especially when they change and we do not know why. It sounds like you try and cope with the difficult feelings by harming yourself and you’re worried that it’s become a habit now. 

From what you’ve explained, it seems like you want to stop making your thumbs bleed. When you’re trying to stop self-harming, it is important to find other ways of coping to replace the self-harm that you would usually do.  We’re all different so what’s right for one person might be different to what’s right for someone else.  Some people might find that it helps them to express their feelings through something that involves physical activity. Others might do something creative and find it helps to draw or write about what they’re going through. If you’d like some more ideas about ways of trying to cope, you could take a look at the Young Minds webpage on Self-harm .

Remember that it can take time to reduce and stop self-harming and you might need to try things more than once before they start to work. It can be a good idea to get help when you’re trying to stop self-harming so that you’re not going through it on your own. Maybe you could think about which people would be good at offering you support at this difficult time. Perhaps a teacher, a friend, the school nurse or someone else you trust. You can always talk this through with ChildLine as well. 

You’ve done really well to get in touch.

Take care of yourself.

Sam