Ask Sam letter

Hi there,

Thanks for your message.

It seems like when you feel stressed your spending gets out of control. It is understandable that this could make you feel better temporarily since it can feel exciting to get new things, treat yourself and feel good in your new clothes. However it also sounds like it is creating more stress afterwards when you realise you have spent your money.

Stress can be hard to cope with and it is really positive that you’re aware of what you’re feeling and how you are dealing with it. It might be an idea to think about talking to an adult that you trust about the stress you are experiencing. Perhaps talking about what’s at the root of your stress might help you to get your feelings out in a more positive way.

I can hear that you worry about spending. It might be a good idea to make yourself a budget. A budget is a clear plan of what money you have, any money you are getting and what payments are going out. Calculating a budget for yourself can help you organise where you need to cut back on spending and how much you can save. It will also help you see where all your money goes.

If you can work out how much money you have each month then you can make a clear decision on exactly how much you want to allow yourself to spend. Sometimes it can also be a good idea to have a separate account for savings. Having a budget doesn’t mean you can’t spend anything on yourself – it just means planning ahead. If you can afford to treat yourself now and then, this isn’t a bad thing to do if you have it in your budget.

You are very welcome to come and talk to one of our ChildLine counsellors about all the things that are happening for you. You can log on for a 1-2-1 chat or call us on 0800 1111 (this is a free number, even from a mobile). It might help you to hear how other young people cope with stress by taking a look at our message boards.

Hope some of this helps.

Take care,
Sam