Ask Sam letter


To Sam


Hello Sam

im writing to you cos I really don't know what to do with my self....I find it very hard to behave defiantly in school , I get in to fights a lot too , I have ADHD what might play a roll in it , atm I'm getting home schooled while I'm waiting for a place at  a pupil referful unit  , every time I say I'm going to get better I just ruin it , my dad likes the drink nd he gets drunk a lot nd wen he gets drunk he can get angry really easily nd I feel out of control when he's like that  so other times I crave to always be in control....I loses my temper easily nd lets just say I'm great ful that this dude at school had dropped the chargers from my last attack......I don't want to be like this but I think it's too late , I'm too deep You think I'm a lost cause?

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Thanks for your letter explaining more about yourself and how you are finding it hard to cope.

You told me about your behaviour and how you lose your temper easily and get into fights. You said that you think these things might be down to your ADHD. The good thing is that you recognise that you have these issues and you want things to change. It can be hard to admit that we have an issue like this and even harder to ask for help, so you have done well in taking this first step by writing to me.

You also mentioned your dad's drinking and how you feel this is affecting you and making you feel out of control. It can be really hard when the behaviour and actions of someone close to us makes us feel this way. Sometimes people don't realise how their actions can affect us.

I’m wondering if you have spoken to anyone else about your behaviour and how you want to change. You have taken an important and brave first step in writing this letter to me. It might be that talking things through with an adult you trust (like a teacher or maybe a doctor) could lead to you getting some support to help you manage your anger. Having someone to talk to, like a counsellor for example, could also help you work out some strategies to help you cope when you feel out of control. Talking to a ChildLine counsellor might be a good starting point. You can email, phone them on 0800 1111 or log on for a 1-2-1 chat.

There is also some information about managing anger, including some techniques that you might like to try, on our page about Anger.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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