Ask Sam letter

Hi there,

It’s good to hear from you and I am glad you’ve got in touch.

I know that telling people how you are feeling can be difficult sometimes. You’ve done really well to let me know what's going on for you.

Lots of people get in touch with me and let me know about feeling depressed. Some people say they self-harm to cope.

Many people who self-harm do it to cope with strong feelings - there are different things that you can try to help cope with the urges to harm yourself. Finding distractions can be a good way to take your mind off harming or help you to deal with some of the feelings you have. Feelings like these can be hard to understand and can be confusing so it's important to give yourself time to deal with this.

You might already be able to think of some things that may work as a distraction for you. If you’re finding it hard to think of ideas you could have a look at information about coping with self-harm or look at the ChildLine message boards where other people share their experiences. Some people use hobbies or interests that they already have as distractions while others discover new ones. Sometimes you may try a few different things before you find a way of coping that works best for you. Only you will know what the right distraction for you will be.

Often talking to people can help coping with strong feelings and help you to harm yourself less. I know that sometimes if can be difficult to talk to people about feeling down and self-harming. Many young people tell me that it helps to talk to someone outside their family like a teacher. It can sometimes be easier to open up to someone who you feel doesn't know you too well and who is not close to you.

It might help to talk to a ChildLine counsellor. They don’t judge and would be able to keep what you’ve said confidential. You can get in touch with a ChildLine counsellor by emailing, logging on for a 1-2-1 chat or calling us for free on 0800 1111.

Take care,
Sam