Ask Sam letter


To Sam

The way I look down there.

I do not like the way my vagina looks . I am 16 and I want to have sex but I'm self conscious . Can u help me ? I really need assurance that my vagina looks okay.
Ask Sam


Hi there,  

It’s natural to have questions when you’re thinking about having sex, and it’s good to try to find out about anything that you’re unsure of.

Like other parts of your body, every vagina is different. A lot of girls worry that their vaginas should look a certain way and the most common worry is that it looks wrong or different. Most girls will have had the same worry at some point. It’s ok to talk to a nurse or a doctor about anything that you’re concerned about or that’s making you feel self-conscious or unsure.

Learning about puberty and sexual health at school can involve looking at diagrams of different parts of the body to help us understand. These diagrams might be scientifically accurate, but in real life everyone is different. Sometimes comparing ourselves to pictures and photographs can be unhelpful. 

Everyone has questions or worries about sex and it’s natural to feel like this. It’s a good idea to talk to the person that you’re thinking of having sex with so that you’re both aware of how each other is feeling.

Brook have some good information about vaginas that might be useful to look at. You can also talk to a counsellor and read what other young people say on the message boards if you still want more support.

ChildLine is here for you whenever you need us.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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