My friend and i used to be best friends and go everywhere together! she was really nice and my best friend. But then she started to hang around some other girls who smoke. I was really worried she would start to smoke too. So i talked to her about it and she just got really angry with me. And now she smokes everyday after school and some times does drugs as well im really worried about her. When ever i try to talk to her she always ignores me! I want to try and help because she has been doing it everyday after school for weeks and i dont want her to get ill.....What should i do?
Sam
Hi there,
Thank you for your letter, and telling me about your situation with your friend. From what you have said it sounds like you were really good, close friends and spend a lot of time together, but this has changed since she has made new friends. I imagine that you may be missing her very much and the time that you have had together.
It sounds like you really care for your friend and well done for having courage to tell her about your concerns. It sounds like you are feeling that this has made her angry with you but I want to reassure you that you have not done anything wrong by letting her know youre worried about her.
If you would like to, you can read some more information about smoking in the Explore section of the ChildLine website. Frank are an organisation who have lots of good information about smoking or taking drugs and you might want to look at their page about what to do if you are worried about a friend. I have added some information for you about quitting smoking which includes available services and some videos.
I want you to know that it is not your responsibility to get your friend to stop smoking or taking drugs. You sound like a really good and caring friend, but no-one can make your friend stop smoking or taking drugs until she wants to do it for herself.
I imagine that it is difficult for you to see your friend changing and moving further away from you. Trying to support a friend can bring lots of different feelings up so it may help to have some support and a space to express your thoughts. Is there a trusted adult you can share your thoughts with? Remember ChildLine is here to support you and if you would like to, you can call on 0800 1111 or sign up and chat online, for free and in confidence.
Take care,
Sam
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