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To Sam

Confused- Is this actually sexual harrasment?

Hi Sam,

Recently, a lot of boys have been asking me for pictures of me in my bra or sometimes, naked pictures. It's been about 6 different boys who haved asked me now, and even when I've said no, they still presurre me into doing it.

I have said no to all of them, but it's hard to when they keep on asking.

There's no teachers, friends, or family who I feel comfortable talking too about it. I'm only 13, and it's really getting to me.

Is it sexual harrasment? Is there anyone I can talk to?

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

I’m glad you’ve felt able to tell me what these boys have been saying to you. These boys have no right to ask you for pictures, and should not be pressuring you. What they are doing is very wrong.

You said it’s hard to keep saying 'no'. It can be hard to stick to 'no' when people are constantly asking, so well done for standing your ground. However, it can be easier to keep saying 'no' when you have more support - someone to turn to when things are tough. It might help to look the information about sexting on Think U Know so you know what you are protecting yourself from by saying 'no'.

You also said there is no one you feel comfortable talking to. Sharing what’s been happening might be difficult but for the situation to change you will have to tell someone. I would like you to remember that you haven’t done anything wrong, these boys should not be asking for pictures.

If you think you won’t be able to find the right words you could show a teacher or an adult family member the letter you’ve written to me.

You also don’t have to make a decision straight away. You can talk through the situation and the feelings you have in a 1-2-1 chat, on the phone, or by sending an email. Well done for getting in touch.

Take care,

Sam

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