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To Sam

why don't people like me at my new school?

I don't know why people don't like me at my new school. I introduce myself to people but no body was interested. I even found someone with the same last name as me and even that person wasn't interested. I just don't understand why the people there don't like me. I'm not very shy at all and everyone at my old school liked me.
Ask Sam


Hi there,

Part of growing up is learning how to meet new people and making friends, but this is sometimes easier said than done – especially when you move to a new school.

When it feels like people don’t understand you it can feel more difficult to make friends. When we’ve tried to make friends and it doesn’t feel like it’s working it can knock our confidence.

It’s important to stay positive about the good things about yourself and to remember how things were at your old school. You said that everyone liked you there and this makes me think that over time you will be able to make some new friends and feel more included.

Thinking about what it was like to make friends before and what you think are important qualities in a friendship can help you to build confidence in yourself. This can play a big part in making friends.

One way of meeting people who like similar things to you could be to join a lunchtime or after school group. Talking to a teacher about this might help you to find out what kinds of groups there are at your school. If there isn’t one that you like, maybe you could start one yourself that you think could be popular.

Most schools have a service to offer pupils support with any kinds of problems or worries that they have. Thinking about having a chat about how you’ve been feeling could be the first step to starting to feel more settled.

There are ChildLine counsellors to listen whenever you’d like to talk about anything that’s on your mind. Looking at the message boards to see how other young people settled into their new schools might also be helpful.

Take care,

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