Ask Sam letter


To Sam

STDs and parents

I have some unusual things happening to my private parts and i told my mum, she laughed and called me a slag and a slut and horrible names.. She said I have a std and that I have sex with everyone and anyone which is a lie. I am not sure what to do as I can't walk properly due to broken foot and she won't take it seriously. I am in pain and I need to get help and see if it is normal or a std / sti. How can I talk to my mum and get her to listen and not ignore me when I can't do anything to find out myself when she laughed and walks away from me .
Ask Sam


Hi there,

Thank you for having the courage to write to me. There could be lots of reasons why you see unusual things happening to your private parts – it might be that it’s something normal that just seems unusual to you. Whatever it is, getting medical advice is what’s important.

As it seems like your mum is not taking your concerns seriously, you might need to arrange to see a doctor yourself or maybe go with a friend.

It's wrong for your mum to call you horrible names. This is emotional abuse. Perhaps you could think about talking to her about how you feel when she laughs or walks away from you. And let her know you'd like her help. If she doesn't listen, you could think of talking to another adult you trust. You deserve to get support.

If you'd like to speak to a counsellor we can help you work out what you want to say and how to say it.

A sexually transmitted infection (STI) is a kind of disease passed from one person to another through unprotected sexual contact. There are other medical problems that affect your private parts, and the only way to find out what’s wrong is to see a doctor.

If you’re worried that you might have and STI, it’s important you get checked out as soon as possible. To get tested for STI’s you can go to your doctor or you can go to your nearest sexual health (GUM) clinic – some of these are confidential and are just for young people, like Brook.

If you do have sex, it’s important to look after your sexual health and find out about contraception to protect you from getting pregnant and from sexually transmitted infections.

I hope this helps. Remember you can contact us any time. We're here for you.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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