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Asker

To Sam

I can't stand it any more :(

I really hate my mum!!!!  She beats me and hits me all the time when my dad's of at work. My hands go green and purple even though im tanned. Sometimes she pinches me her nailes till my hand goes green. And once she kicked me with all her strenghth on my back and made my nose bleed!!!!
I have not told anyone except you and my dad. My dad doesn't seem bothered although he would never use violence against me, he talks to her sometimes but she never stops.
Im afraid she'll do it to my younger brother and 2 sisters when they get older she only started getting this fierce with me when i was in 6th class, they are younger than 8 year
please help i tried sending you a letter before but it didn't reach you i think. I really want her to stop, im already stressed because of school and career choices i cant take any more
thanks
Ask Sam

Sam

Hi,

Thanks for coming through and sharing what life is like for you at home. You should feel proud of yourself for taking a step to get support for yourself and your brother and sisters.

It sounds like you’re not safe at home because of the physical abuse you get from your mum. I want you to know that it’s not your fault and you’ve done nothing wrong. I can hear that you’re really worried that your mum might start to hurt your brother and sisters too. Your mum should not be hurting any of you. Physical abuse is against the law and you deserve to get help with this.

You’ve done well to share what’s happening with your dad. I’m frustrated to hear that he didn’t seem bothered and that your mum is still hurting you, even though he’s talked to her. I want you to know that there are other people out there who will understand how important this is and who will really want to help you.

I’m concerned about the injuries that you’ve had from your mum. I would encourage you to think about getting some medical attention if mum hurts you like that again. This may feel like a difficult thing to do, but important that you’re kept safe. You could speak to your local doctor, go to a NHS walk in clinic or you could even call 999 in an emergency. Another possibility would be to talk to somebody at school, like the school nurse or counsellor or your favourite teacher, and let them know that you’ve been hurt and need some help.

Even if you don’t need urgent medical attention, it would be good for you to think about asking a trusted adult for support. They might be able to help if you tell them what life at home is like and how worried you are about your brothers and sisters. One thing they might want to do is speak to social services, who could help keep you and your brothers and sisters safe. If you’re not sure how to start that conversation, perhaps you could try writing it down for them. You’ve done a great job of writing things down for me, so you could even try showing someone this letter.

I’m sorry that you didn’t get a response from me the first time you wrote. All children and young people are important to me and if I could answer all the letters I receive I would.

If you would like some more help with thinking things over, you can always talk to one of the counsellors at ChildLine. You can call them on 0800 1111, or log in for a 1-2-1 chat.

Take care

Sam

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