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My friend keeps inviting me to a sleepover at her house. I want to go but she has a dog at home and I am afraid of dogs. I don't want to tell her the real reason I can't go. Otherwise I would go. Help?
Hi there,
It’s natural to be afraid sometimes. Being scared is a natural way we protect ourselves, but sometimes we can feel fear when there isn’t actually any danger. If your fears are stopping you from living your life, it’s important to get help.
There are lots of ways to get support with your fears. Talking about them with an adult you trust can help you to think about them differently, and they can also help you to think about ways to spend time with dogs in safe settings to help you feel less scared.
It’s great that you want to be honest with your friend. Sharing how you’re feeling with her can help in lots of ways, including giving her a chance to help make it easier for you to sleep over.
It can be hard being open with someone. You might be worried about hurting her feelings or being embarrassed, but it can help to remember that you’ve not done anything wrong and you’re not blaming your friend.
You don’t have to say everything all at once, just sharing a little bit can help others to understand and support you. You could try saying, "I really want to come over, but I get really nervous around dogs. I’m working on ways to feel more comfortable so I can."
A good friend should want you to feel safe and happy. If you’re struggling to start the conversation, you could send it as a message or ask your parent or guardian to help.
Your friend being aware can also help them to think about ways to make it easier. They might be able to keep the dog in another room or talk to you about what would make you less scared. Over time they could help you feel more comfortable going round.
Lots of young people have a fear of dogs and lots of other things, so you’re not alone. It might help to share how you’re feeling and get tips on ways to cope on the message boards.
Take care,
Sam
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