Hi there, thanks for your letter.
Firstly, it's important to find out if your girlfriend is pregnant. Go to a doctor or family planning clinic to get this confirmed, even if she's done a test herself. You need to do this so she can get the right advice and support for herself and the baby. If you're worried about doing that, you can read more about visiting a doctor here.
Having sex with a woman when she's pregnant is absolutely fine. The baby won't be harmed or killed by doing this. The baby is naturally protected and won't be affected. If she is pregnant you could talk to a GP or midwife about any worries you've got about this.
Being pregnant can change the way both males and females feel about having sex. If you or your girlfriend have any worries then you should talk to each other about them.
It's always important that both people feel comfortable and ready each time they have sex. Both of you can say no at any time if you don't want to do it for any reason.
It sounds like you might have had unprotected sex if you think your girlfriend is pregnant, or maybe you're worried that the contraception you used didn't work properly. This is something you might want to talk about between you if she isn't already pregnant. Unless you are planning on having a baby it's important to take contraception seriously.
Practising safe sex is something you should get into the habit of doing so that both people can enjoy themselves without worrying about unwanted pregnancy or infections. You can talk with your girlfriend about which contraception will suit you both. You can find out more from a doctor about the different types of contraception available or check out our page about it.
If you need to talk more about pregnancy or going to the doctor, ChildLine counsellors are always there for you. You can call for free on 0800 1111, send an email or log on for a 1-2-1 chat.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.
