Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Sending naked photos

Hi Sam

im 12 and my boyfriend keeps making me play dirty dares and making me send naked photos to him I always say no or make up an excuse like the photos go to my dads phone but it doesn't seem to work and if I don't send him photos heel tell everyone at school that I have been sending him photos when I haven't what do I do please help me 😳😂

Ask Sam


Hi there,

No one has the right to force you or pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to do. If you’ve been forced into sending a photo to someone, it's never your fault.

If somebody has or looks at a naked photo of you if you’re under 15, it’s considered to be child pornography. And it’s illegal whether they’d been given the photo or they took it themselves. If they keep that photo or show it to someone else, it's a serious crime.

Having someone threaten to expose pictures of you can be really scary. And it’s important that this is stopped from happening. It can be embarrassing to talk about things like this sometimes, but it’s important to remember that you’ve not done anything wrong. 

When someone’s threatening you like this, it can sometimes feel like it’s never ending but remember there is help out there. You might want to think about telling someone and getting some support so that you don’t have to cope with this on your own. Maybe you could talk to a trusted adult in your life, like a parent, relative or teacher.

Your school has a responsibility to take any form of abuse or threats seriously and they should help to make it stop.

If your boyfriend continues to pressure you to send him photos, Zipit - an app with lots of advice about sexting - can help.

It can also help to think about your relationship and what feels right for you. And how you want to be treated by your boyfriend.

Making decisions on what do next can sometimes be really tough, and often it's difficult to make these decisions alone. You might find it helpful to have a look on the our message boards or even post if you felt able to. Sometimes, talking to someone else can be a good way to get a different perspective and can help you think about different choices you might have.

You’ve done well to get in touch, and remember we're here if you'd like to talk to a counsellor about this some more. Our counsellors are always there to support you.

Thank you for your letter for sharing what you are going through.

Take care.


Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter