Ask Sam letter


To Sam

My Best friend took a video of me half naked.

So my best friend and our two other friendS were at one of the two friends house. We just came back from the pool so I was changing in her closet,(my three friends were right by the closet because they were putting on makeup by the sink which was next to the closet) Then my best friend thought it would be funny to take a video on my phone when I only had only my top on. They were all laughing and she even zoomed in me in the video. They all said that it was fine because my legs were covering my lower body(I was trying to cover myself with my legs when she filmed me) but when I rewatched the video by myself, my private part was still shown very clear on camera. My friends kept on trying to watch the video but I said no. Infact, back when I was still changing, they still opened the door and took a video of me but thank god I was wearing a underwear. And of course, she still even zoomed in me in my underwear. I felt so uncomfortable and super upset. I was even to scared to tell my parents that especially when we were all 12 years old. Sometimes I don't even like my three friends because they act so toxic sometimes. One friend spread drama about me in my whole grade and doesn't even bother to talk to me when she is with her close friends at school, one always judges me and treats me like I am her slave, and the other acts so rude and hurts my feelings. Please help me out, I am so sad.:(

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Friends are supposed to be people we can trust and rely on, no matter what. If someone is doing things that make you upset, it’s okay to tell them how you feel about that. If they don’t change then perhaps it might be time to find friends who don’t hurt your feelings.

Bullying comes in lots of different forms, but when the people bullying you are supposed to be friends it’s sometimes harder to see it as bullying. We might tell ourselves that they didn’t really mean it or are just messing around but if it happens a lot, especially after you tell them to stop, then it’s bullying.

Although most people find bullying upsetting, it’s especially difficult when your friends are involved. There’s probably a lot of mixed feelings you’re having right now because your friends really let you down. It sounds like it’s not the first time this has happened either.

What might be a good idea is to share what you’ve told me with someone else who doesn’t know these people. This could be someone in your family or other friends you know outside of this group. Look at their reaction and see if they think it’s okay. Sometimes it’s hard to see how bad a relationship it is when you’re so close to it and you need other people to show you.

Whatever happens you deserve to have friends that respect you and make you feel good about yourself. There’s no point in spending time with people who make you unhappy. It’s often better to leave those people behind and find better people to be around. This might mean there’s a time where you have fewer friends or even no friends at all. That can be tough so make sure you talk to someone you trust about it – if you don’t have anyone then that could be Childline.

Try to value yourself higher and remind yourself that people are lucky to have you as a friend.


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