Ask Sam letter


To Sam

I think ive got my girlfriend pregnant

I know you get a lot of teenagers thinking they're ready to have a child and I was one of them but now I've realised how scary it actually is.

My girlfriend had been showing signs of early pregnancy at 16 years old and I don't know what to do, I'm supportive in what she wants and I tell her that I think I'm ready because it's what she wants to hear but really, I'm a 16 year old boy that is out of his comfort zone and is a nervous wreck.

Will you please give me some advise onto how to tell her and even my family about this situation.... Thank you.

Ask Sam


Hi there

Having a child is a massive commitment and it can feel very scary when you’re unsure what's going on.

You mentioned early signs of pregnancy. I’d really encourage you and your girlfriend to speak to a medical professional about this – so that you know what you’re dealing with and can access the right support.

You and your girlfriend may prefer to find out whether or not she definitely is pregnant before you share this with anyone else. You can do this by taking a pregnancy test. You can get those for free from your GP, an NHS walk-in centre or a sexual health clinic.

Whatever happens, you’ve got important decisions to make about what you want to happen in the future. It’s important to talk this through as a couple. Talking honestly about how you feel and what you want is usually the best way to move forward. I can hear you’re trying to be supportive by saying what you think your girlfriend wants to hear, but this is likely to cause problems in the future if you’re not being honest.

It’s very natural to be nervous at the thought of becoming a parent and it’s likely that the people around you will have similar worries and concerns that you have. You may be worried about the reaction you will get or that people could put pressure on you to do one thing or another. But you both need to do what’s best for you, not for what others want.

This might be something you wanted to talk through with a ChildLine counsellor. It could be helpful to think about who you wanted to talk to first and what kind of things might make it easier for you.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter