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Hi,
Thank you for writing your letter to me. You have been really brave and you did the right thing to talk about this.
Im really worried about how your boyfriend is treating you. The way hes acting would be described as domestic violence. This behaviour is very wrong and is also extremely dangerous to your physical and your mental health. The fact that he is drunk when he hurts you doesnt make it understandable or ok. Lots of people have a drink now and again but would still never ever treat another person the way he has treated you.
You deserve to have a healthy relationship that is about trust, respect and love. The Brook website has some really helpful information about healthy and unhealthy relationships. It sounds clear to me that your boyfriend hasnt been treating you in the way you deserve. Your boyfriend does not have the right to hurt you and you should be treated much better than this. Im really glad to hear that youve been able to make the decision to leave him, I understand thats a really difficult thing to do. I can hear that you feel really scared about how to keep yourself safe now.
There are a lot of people out there that can help, so you dont have to go through this all on your own. It sounds like your dad may already be aware of what is happening? Do you feel you can talk to him for help? Remember, you can always ring the police if you are in danger. Youve told me you called the police once before and that was absolutely the right thing to do. I can hear you are worried that they wont believe you if you need to call them again. The police understand that it can be very difficult for a person to get away from an abusive relationship and should always take your concerns seriously.
You can also call the National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0808 2000 247 for support and advice about the services that are out there for you. If you are over 16, they may be able to find a place for you in a refuge, which is a safe place where you boyfriend wont be able to find you. The Womens Aid website has really useful advice about how to make a safety plan if you are in an abusive relationship or thinking of leaving.
You always have us here at Childline. You dont have to go through this all on your own. You have the right to be safe and with help, that can happen for you.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.