Ask Sam letter


To Sam

he has a girlfriend

i am in love with a band member from black veil brides, a famous rock band, but he has a girlfriend and it kills me to the point where i cut myself to pieces, everyone thinks its just a teenage crush, everyone thinks its lust, no one understands how much i love him, not just for his looks but his personality is absulutly amazing, i would give my life for him and everyone underestimates me, they say "you dont love him, you dont know what love is, you will get over it." it annoys me becauseĀ  deep down i am so in love with this guy, he is 22 i am 14 i know theres no chance i cry myself to sleep nearly every night because of it help me sam please
Ask Sam


Hello there

Thanks for taking the time to write to me about what is happening to you. It sounds like you are struggling to cope with the really strong feelings you have for this band member.

I'm aware that many young people self-harm to help them to cope with difficult feelings and emotions. It's important that you seek medical help if you are concerned about your self-harming. For example, if bleeding goes on longer than usual or if you begin to feel unwell. You may find it helpful to look at the information about coping with self-harm on this site.

From what you have told me I can hear that nobody understands how much you love everything about this person. It can be difficult to feel alone with such strong and real feelings. I wonder how you'd feel about trying to talk honestly with your friends and maybe family about the feelings you are having just like you have in your letter to me, this can be helpful for some people. I know that might be really hard for you but it would give them a chance to understand just how deeply you feel and maybe then they could support you better.

You have made a really good start by writing to me, maybe the next step for you could be to contact a Childline counsellor to talk it through with someone who is there to listen and help you think about what to do. If you would like to ring ChildLine the number is 0800 1111 or you can go online for a 1-2-1 chat. You could also look at the sex and relationships message board to get support and advice from others on Childline.

Take care,


Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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