Hi there,
It can be really hard when we feel like our friends dont want to be around us or arent paying as much attention to us as they are to each other. But there are things you could try change the way things are.
It might be small things that they dont really mean to do, but make you feel as though they dont care. Its important to try and look at how they might be feeling, to try and understand whats happening. You and your friends might be seeing things very differently.
Try writing down what specific things your friends do that make you feel left out. Then for each one you can write down what makes you feel this way and also how you think your friends might see it.
Your feelings about it are really important. It can make you feel lonely and isolated. But understanding your feelings also means understanding theirs. If after doing this you feel like your friends really are deliberately doing things to leave you out, then this is something you could to talk to them about - even though thats scary. You could also talk to other people or try being assertive.
Friends should respect you and make you feel comfortable when you're with them. You can read our top tips for making friends.
Youve done really well to get in touch. You could always try talking to a counsellor for more support. Or try asking other young people on our message boards what they might do.
Thanks for the letter.
Take care.
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.
