Ask Sam letter


To Sam

depression nightmares

Hey Sam my name is n and I have to tell someone. My cousin used to make me touch his private parts when I was younger. I didn't tell anyone about this. When I was about 8 he made me suck his dick and then he did things to me. I dont know why I didnt tell anyone .Probably because I was too scared and nobody would believe me. He died a few weeks earlier and I cant stop thinking about the things he did to me. My mum and dad loved him. I can't sleep at night. What should I do?
Ask Sam


Hi N,

Sexual abuse can happen to both boys and girls of all ages. It can happen once or many times. Abusers can be male, female, strangers, or people we know including family members.

Sexual abuse can be difficult to talk about, and the effects of the abuse can continue long after the abuse stops. No matter what anybody says, sexual abuse is not your fault.

The death of your cousin may have stirred up memories or flashbacks of what happened when you were younger. Writing this letter was a really brave thing to do. I think it suggests that you’re ready to talk about what happened. Talking about sexual abuse with somebody you trust is an important part of the healing process.

Whether you decide to talk to a family member, a friend or trusted adult, it’s important to choose somebody who will believe and support you. You don't say if you're a boy or a girl, but Survivors UK is an organisation that supports boys and young men who have been sexually abused. You could also take a look at what other young people say about their experiences of sexual abuse on the ChildLine message boards or talk to a ChildLine counsellor any time.

Take care,

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