Need help straight away?
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
Hi B,
Thank you for your letter. It can be really difficult when youre worried about a friend, especially when it feels like your other friends arent really helping or are making things worse. Its brilliant that youve written to me to help think about what you can do.
Im concerned to hear that your friend hasnt really been eating, especially when shes been fainting as well. When you feel like a friend may have an eating problem, its really natural to not know what to do. Im wondering what it might be like to say to your friend that you're worried, and perhaps to talk to her about what it might be like for you both to go to someone you trust, like a teacher, to ask for help.
One of the hardest things about worrying about a friend is accepting that it has to be their choice about whether they get support. Your friend might not be ready to talk about things yet, or she may find it difficult talking about her problems to someone she's close to. However, if it gets to the point where youre really concerned about her health, then that is the time to go and talk to an adult that you trust. You could consider letting your friend know that you are concerned enough to feel like you have to tell someone.
I can see how much you care about your friend, but also how hard it is that shes trying to make you eat her food when youre trying to balance your own meals. It can feel like a lot of responsibility when you are trying to look out for a friend. Its important to remember to take care of yourself as well. Its okay to say if shes doing something that bothers you.
It soudnds like all this worry is a lot to handle on your own, and Im wondering what it might be like to talk to a ChildLine counsellor about whats been happening. The counsellors can give you an opportunity to talk about whats making you worried about your friend, as well as helping you to think about what you might like to do. You could even ask your friend to contact them as well, to give her an opportunity to talk to someone independent and confidential.
You can talk to ChildLine on 1-2-1 chat (which works like instant messenger), by phoning 0800 1111 (its completely free and wont show up on the phone bill) or even by writing an email.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.