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Hi there,
Thanks for your message. Its really good that youre talking about this and I can see that youre wondering what to do about your brother. Youve mentioned some really important things that have been happening and Im concerned that your brother is hurting you. Nobody has the right to hurt you and if you ever feel in danger, you have the right to get help. Its not OK for your brothers best friend to be hurting your brother either and I can tell that youre feeling really angry about that happening. Some people find talking to others about what is going on for them can help - perhaps this might work for you and your brother.
It sounds as though your brother is going through a lot. When somebody you care about is having a difficult time, it can be tough to see it happening and it can leave you feeling unsure about what would help. Your brother seems to have been talking about hurting himself and killing himself and from what youve explained, he has told you that he is going to kill himself on his 16th birthday. It is important to get help for him and you dont have to try to cope with all of this on your own. You said that your brother might hate you for telling others and I can tell that this is making it feel harder to tell someone. Youre not responsible for stopping your brother from hurting himself. If you are worried that he isnt safe, its important for him to get help as soon as possible so that other people can help to look after him and support you too.
I noticed that you try and act like you dont care when your brother talks to you about how he is planning to hurt himself. When somebody is going through a difficult time, it can be helpful for them to know that somebody is there for them. If you feel able to listen to your brother and tell him that you care about him, it might be good for him to hear that. If you feel as though itd be too much for you to hear more about his feelings, perhaps you could suggest that he could talk to a ChildLine counsellor or to a trusted adult. There's more information on the website about supporting somebody whos feeling suicidal.
You explained that your family has been going through a lot, like divorce and finding out that your grandma has a brain tumour and Im wondering what support you feel youve been getting at this difficult time. You can talk to ChildLine at any time. You might also like to think about keeping a diary to let some of your feelings out. It might also be helpful if you think about letting school know what youre going through. It sounds as though your GCSEs mean a lot to you and you sound worried that the things happening at home could affect your studies. If somebody at school is aware of whats happening, they might be able to offer you some more support.
Im really glad that youve written. Im sure that there are lots of young people reading this who might be in similar situations and your message will have helped them to know that they are not alone and that they can get help.
Thanks for writing.
Take care,
Sam.
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
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