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Everyone hates me

I just moved to a new school and in the past iv been through alot ,i had to move into a refuge because of domestic violence and this year has been super hard. At my old school i was friends with everyone, i spoke to everone and everyone liked me but since i moved into my new school literally EVERYONE hates me. It all started because i dated this boy and everyone called me a slut and a whore then i dumped him and then all his friends, which were most of my friends, hated me. after this i was being called names and being bullied daily by them. They have pretty much hated me since but i made some new friends which were really nice ,2 girls which were both very quiet and nice. But one day in PE i was talking to one of them about how everyone was being mean and then some girl said something to me and i said "Did you just see that?!" then she said no and you knw when you say something like that and then someone doest see it or hear it and you say as a joke like you must be blind or something, well i said that and the at the end of the lesson when we were getting changed she was upset about it and i honestly didnt mean it in a offensive way but she took it the wrong way. But then the whole changing room was screaming at me and surrounding me and it was really scary i started crying and they all called me a baby and stuff im 12 im not a baby but when theres a whole room of people that dont like you surounding you and screaming at you for nothing its over whelming i just couldnt take it plus i had already had a bad day because the morning before me and my mum fell out really bad and i was really upset then too. The whole PE thing happened today and im so scared to go in tomorrow but i dont want to tell my mum because she really worries about me and iv been lying to her since i started the school saying that everything was great and i had loads of friend. i honestly dont know what to do its never happened to me before and i honestly have never had suicidal thought before but recently i have been thinking of killing myself it sounds like im trying to be a drama queen but its ttrue. please help me.
Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

Thanks for your letter.

It sounds like it's been a very difficult year for you. It can be very hard to cope with so many changes happening in your life and you’ve shown a lot of courage to write to me.

I can hear that things at your new school started okay but now it feels like everyone hates you. The incident you described in the changing room sounds very distressing and overwhelming for you. It seems like this is almost the opposite to how school felt for you before you moved. It’s not okay for people to bully you and it is not your fault that they are treating you this way.

It sounds like being bullied has made you start to think about suicide and that’s worrying to hear. I want to encourage you to try to talk to someone about these feelings. You don’t sound like a drama queen, you sound like you are struggling to cope at the moment. 

You don't have to be alone when you feel suicidal. The ChildLine counsellors can support you and help you keep yourself safe. It’s okay to talk to them about feeling suicidal but if they feel like you might try to do something to end your life then they may need to tell someone who can help you. You can find out more about that if you read our confidentiality promise. You may also find it helps to look at our page on coping with suicidal feelings.

You can talk to a counsellor any time, day or night, by phoning free on 0800 1111. You can also log on for a 1-2-1 chat or send an email.

All schools have a responsibility to protect you from being bullied. They will have an anti-bullying policy which explains what they will do if you tell them you are being bullied. It’s okay to ask to see this policy so you can understand what will happen if you tell someone at school. You might like to think about talking to a teacher you trust to explain what’s been happening and how it makes you feel. Writing down what the bullies do can be helpful as it means you don’t have to remember everything when you want to tell someone.

Talking to a parent or carer about being bullied can feel difficult, but it might also be really helpful. You could think about writing them a letter if saying the words out loud feels too hard. There is some more advice you might find helpful in our Bullying section. You could also see if you can use these tips to help you make new friends at school.

I hope this helps.  

Take care,

Sam

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