Can you get raped by someone younger than you? | Ask Sam
I am not asking for legal advice as I know you aren't a lawyer, but I was hoping for some general guidance. I am 16 years old and a 13 year old forced me to have sex with him. I would call it rape because I didn't have a choice but he did. But he is under the age of consent and I am not. I don't know how to bring this up because I don't know how to prove I didn't consent, and I am worried people will look at our ages and decide I am the rapist. I don't even have any desire to tell the police, I am just planning on telling my parents and maybe a member of staff in school, but I am worried about how they will respond. I have spoken to a nurse about it already, but I didn't mention the bit about ages. It also feels embarrassing that it happened from someone younger than me. I wish I had more power in that moment.
Sam
Hi there,
Anybody can be raped or sexually assaulted. This person being younger than you doesn’t excuse what they did, and it doesn’t make it okay. You’ve not done anything wrong, and you deserve support.
No matter how old you are, if you haven’t consented to something sexual then that’s assault. It’s natural to have different feelings after being sexually assaulted, and lots of young people talk about feeling embarrassed about it.
When you’re worried about how people might react, it can help to think about who you think would be most supportive. Whether it’s your parents or someone at school, we’ve got advice to help you feel safer talking about things. Remember, if you don’t feel able to speak to someone in your life, our counsellors are still there to support you. You can also get support from Rape Crisis.
Remember that you don’t need to justify what happened. When someone is below the age of consent, they are still able to harm other people. That includes doing something sexual. If you’re worried about being asked questions about it, it can help to have a think about what you feel comfortable saying. Some people find it helps to write about things in a letter.
Take care,
Sam
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