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To Sam


My mum and my grandmother used to be on the smoking and drinking scene and my dad says that I will turn out like them and that  there is no way back and you can not change your genes. I don't know what to do but I also don't know how to stop it. I can't keep it bottled up inside any longer but I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO PLEASE HELP ME. Also, my dad says that i will not achive at drama which is my passion and i keep annoying teachers and I am worried that my friends don't really like me but I am just feeling sorry for myself so nothing will work and I am even having suicidal thoughts but I don't want to call my dad mean or anything like that so please help i really need it.
Ask Sam


Hi there,

Thanks so much for taking the time to write to me about this.

I can hear that you’re feeling very worried about what your Dad has said. Family members often have some things in common but each person is an individual. You have the right to make your own choices in life and decide what feels right for you. You don’t have to take the same path as your Mum and grandmother. 

Drama sounds like a very important part of your life and having lots of passion can help you to keep on going when you are trying to achieve things. I’m wondering if there’s somebody at school you trust who you might be able to talk through these worries with. It seems like you’re worried about annoying teachers and it might help to let them know about this too. You might find this page about talking to adults helpful for you.

I get the impression that your confidence has really been knocked by some of things your Dad has said. I can hear you’re questioning a lot at the moment. When we feel bad about ourselves, it can sometimes make us worry that other people think the same thoughts about us that we have. It could really help to let your friends know what you’re going through. Maybe think about if there’s a friend who you’d like to talk to about this.

I’m concerned to hear that you’re having suicidal thoughts and if you ever feel as though you might do something to put yourself in danger, remember that you can call 999 for emergency help. You can also speak to ChildLine about anything, whenever you want to talk. Our counsellors can be there to listen and help you to think about what you’d like to do.

You’ve done really well to get in touch and I hope that you get the help you need.

Take care,

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