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Hi there,
Thanks for writing in to me. From what you've told me it sounds like things are difficult for you as you say that at the moment there is a huge intricate web of lies and it can be difficult to manage all these. It seems that you are coping with everything that you have going on, on your own. I want to let you know everyone needs support sometimes - it seems that you have people around that are concerned about you, maybe you could think about if there is anyone you trust that could help support you.
I can hear that you really like this guy but it sounds like the situation you are in could have some tough consequences for you and him. I can also hear you have thought about all the possible outcomes of being honest.
You say that you are falling behind at school and your parents and friends are becoming suspicious. I am wondering if you have thought about what would happen if people started to find out about you and this guy (it's possible that your parents might find out and report him to police). This guy has a right to know about your age and what hes getting involved as he is unaware that he is breaking the law.
From what you say it seems that you have feelings for him and would like to continue your relationship but know that being honest with him might mean that the relationship wouldn't continue. Relationships are built on trust and honesty so it might be worth having a look at the Explore page on the ChildLine website as it talks about more relationships.
If you need to talk things through a bit more, you can always get in touch with a ChildLine counsellor. You can contact them either on a 1-2-1 chat, for free on 0800 1111 or you can send an email.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.