[ TW I think ]
I don’t fully know what I expect by writing here, and this seems to be a common issue honestly, but unlike other people I don’t have anyone to help me.
So last year my 8 year old cat (who I was extremely close to) decided to live with our neighbour. As I have anxiety issues I can’t go speak to people myself, so for a full year I‘ve been asking my family for help, and for a full year very little has been done. It’s causing me a lot of stress as I struggle to sleep without wanting to cry about the fact that my cat is outside, under cars, most night. Trust me, I can’t just bring him to my room, there is no possible way to keep him there without him getting out, just trust me on that.
I’ve spoken to my family (mainly my mum) a lot about it, and they’ve not been happy about it. Every night is an argument about it. Granted, all of these interactions happened when people were angry, so they probably didn‘t mean them, but my dad has said he wanted to shoot himself, my brother tried to hit me with a spoon but I moved out the way so he hit the box that was behind me instead, and my mum just said she was going to leave our home and spend the night with my nan, all because of my cat. Me and my mum also have other issues, but there’s really not enough space here.
I’m very obviously not wanted here, and I am genuinely so depressed. I’d never do anything, but quite a lot of the time I just don’t want to be here. I have no friends, no family I‘m close to (and none that live near me that I could reasonably stay with), and I have agoraphobia (3-4 years now). I also have no education and no job (I’m 18 now). I feel so unwelcome at home, everyone is on my mums side, what do I do here? Where do I go?