Ask Sam letter


To Sam

what is wrong with me?

I get really worked up sometimes and i flip and tear up books, punch walls and break stuff my friends think its funny and tease me about throwing 'baby tantrums' . But im twelve. same when my sister annoys me, I get really angry and I want to punch her but I stop myself. However Im scared that one day i'l go too far and hurt somebody, I dont know why I get so worked up... even when Its nothing serious I get so... angry. What if I just flip in public and people think im a freak?
I dont know what to do please help x
Ask Sam


Hi there,

Thank you for writing to me about how you are feeling at the moment – you have done so well writing down all your feelings at what sounds like a difficult time for you.  It is hard to begin to understand something we are not able to explain.

It sounds like you are worried that you might have trouble controlling angry feelings that you have and that you might ‘flip’ when you are out amongst other people you don’t know. It can be confusing when we behave in a way which is new to us or scares us. Emotions or the way we feel, like anger, can be hard to understand sometimes and they can change as we get older. Although we feel them on the inside, they can sometimes make us say and do things we later regret or wish we could take back. This is sometimes because feelings can arise so quickly and be hard to control. One way to start getting some control is to understand our emotions better and why certain things or people make us feel a certain way. There is more information on emotions on the ChildLine website: 

There are certain some stages during life, for example during puberty, when hormones can cause you to be more emotional, frustrated and angry for no obvious reason. It may help to talk through how we are feeling with someone you trust, like a parent/carer, teacher or your family. Some people find it easier to have these conversations with another female if they are girls or males if they are boys.

ChildLine counsellors are always here for you to talk to about how you are feeling and as well as sending an email, you can call 24/7 on 0800 1111 or have a 1-2-1 chat

Sometimes it helps to learn how other young people cope in similar situations and the message boards on the ChildLine website can be a good place to share similar situations.

I am really glad that you have been able to talk to me about this.

Take care,


Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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