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Hello, I'm 15, and I'm a female. I don't know if I'm being stupid but deep down and randomly right now I just feel that I want to cut, I feel I shouldn't be breathing right now. I need help with it, to keep safe. I feel so sad about it and I'm depressed as well. I'm not sure what to do because I keep thinking dying is the best option
Hi there,
Thanks for your letter.
Youve done really well to write to me. It sounds like you are finding things really tough right now, and you deserve to have some support.
Im concerned to hear about the thoughts you have been having. You seem to find it hard to value yourself as you have said that you shouldnt be breathing and you have been having thoughts about ending your life. You have told me that you need help to keep safe, and its good to hear that you want to be safe. You can talk to a ChildLine counsellor at any time, they are there to help you keep yourself safe and support you.
Its okay to talk to ChildLine about feeling suicidal. Talking can really help you to see that there are alternatives to what you are feeling and thinking, even though they may be hard to see right now. What you say is confidential, but our counsellors may want to tell someone who can help you if they feel your life is in immediate danger. The ChildLine confidentiality promise explains more about this.
If you ever feel like you are struggling to keep yourself safe, its okay to call 999 and ask for an ambulance to help you. You should know that there is always help available for you, no matter how low you are feeling.
I can hear you saying that cutting feels like the right way for you to cope at the moment. It also sounds like you would prefer to find a different way to cope. You might find it useful to have a look at the Self-harm page, or our page with some alternative coping techniques.
Youve shown a lot of courage to tell me about whats been going on for you and I want to encourage you to keep talking. You could speak to an adult you trust or one of the counsellors at ChildLine. You can phone them free on 0800 1111, send an email, or log on for a 1-2-1 chat (which is like instant messaging). They really care about you and they want to support you.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.