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Hi there,
You are showing such determination getting yourself to school. Waking up worried and thinking theres a hard day ahead sounds tough.
Although it doesnt help you at school, Im glad you have some friends you feel comfortable with. Some experts say that anxiety isn't always the cause of stuttering, but anxiety can make it worse at times. This explains why you stutter more when youre with people you dont know or when you have to read aloud in front of a class.
Its often hard when someone like a teacher doesnt seem to understand how difficult things are for us. Im glad youre already thinking about whether you or your mom should talk to her, to let her know how hard this is for you.
Some young people are comfortable talking to a teacher or writing a note to them. Others would like a parent to contact the teacher. You could think about what feels right for you. You could even have a 1-2-1 chat online with our counsellors about how you feel. And they can help you prepare what to say to your teacher.
Its wrong for people to laugh at you when they hear you stutter. Youve mentioned this kind of bullying. It can really help to tell a form teacher or head of year about this. Our counsellors can help you with this too.
You mention suffering from depression and anxiety. You can check out our tips for managing anxiety.
I dont know if youve talked to a doctor, but please know doctors talk to many young people about these feelings. There may be some more support you can get through your school or in your community through a doctors referral.
Feeling anxious can affect our breathing and how are body feels, making everything seem worse. Slowing down your breathing is a good trick to know about, especially since you can do it right before speaking without anyone else around you knowing.
Im wondering if it might help if you checked out the support thats out there for people who stutter. The British Stammering Association has great information and a lot of understanding of how hard it can be to get through a day.
Finally, I hope you know there are a lot of very talented and successful people who stuttered. Theres a Wikipedia article called List of Stutterers its got actors, athletes, politicians, writers and more. I realise looking at a Wikipedia page isnt going to change your life and feelings right now, but perhaps it will help you remember that this doesnt have to stop you achieving great things if you want to.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
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