Need help straight away?
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
Hi there,
Thank you for your letter.
Youve been coping with a lot of difficult feelings and emotions on your own for a while. Now that youre feeling ready to talk to someone else, speaking to your school counsellor could be a really good idea.
It can feel very stressful to imagine how someone might react to something important that wed like to tell them. Youre imagining a negative response from your parents. It sounds like remembering how angry your parents were when they found out that your friend self-harms is stopping you from talking to them about how youre feeling.
Often it can be difficult for someone to understand why they self-harm so explaining to someone else can be really hard. You might find it useful to show your parents our self-harm pages, this page at Family Lives or this one at Recover Your Life.
I understand that self-harm can be a way of dealing with lots of different things. Thinking about the feelings that you get before you cut may help when you talk to someone else.
Its important to remember that youre in control of how much you tell someone and sometimes it can help to write down what youd like to say first. The counsellors at ChildLine could even help you to practise what youd like to say if you wanted.
You can always ask your school counsellor first what they can keep private but most professionals do have to tell someone else if theyre worried about your safety. If your school counsellor decides they want to talk to your parents they should talk to you about this first.
We have a page about asking an adult for help - you might find it helpful to read through it.
If you dont feel ready to talk to your school counsellor straight away, you could talk to a ChildLine counsellor in a 1-2-1 chat, by calling 0800 1111 or by sending an email.
I hope we hear from you again when youre ready,
Take care.
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.