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To Sam


My mum is only aware that i have self-harmed once. I have done this alot more than once and i keep trying to tell my mum that it is a big problem and that i haven't just done it the one time. I got told to tell her if i ever get urges to do it again and eery time i do tell her, she always replies with, "but that was just a one-off, you're not going to do it again". I don't know what i have to say or do to get her to realise that this is an on-going issue and that i have done it more than she thinks and knows about. I have self-harmed recently and i don't know how to tell her about it because she still only thinks i have only ever self-harmed once. I don't know how to tell her, or what to say to her.
Ask Sam


Hi there,

It can be really difficult when you build up the courage to tell someone about how you’re feeling and they don’t react in a way you hoped for. But it sounds like you haven’t given up yet and that’s really good. 

Sometimes it can take a couple of times of asking for help and explaining things to get the message you want across and to receive the help you deserve.

Before talking to an adult or someone you trust about a topic that’s difficult or worrying, it’s a good idea to spend some time thinking about exactly what it is you want them to know. Think about what you want them to do or how you want them to react. It's a really good idea to write some stuff down. Once you’ve done this, you can go over what you want to say. You might even want to practise with a ChildLine counsellor

If talking seems too hard, you could write a letter or an email. This way you have the chance to properly work out what you want to say and what kind of support you feel would help.

It might also be a good idea to have a look at our advice about self-harm with your mum. This can help her understand what self-harm is, the reasons why someone may self-harm and what she can do to help support you.

Don’t forget you can also talk things through with a ChildLine counsellor whenever you need to.

I hope this helps.
Take care

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