Ask Sam letter


To Sam

please give me some advice before i totally give up

im 14 i am always being bullied i have told teachers and everything they just make things worse. i am having problems at home and 9 months ago my best friend moved to canada she was the only person i felt like i had now shes gone ! when she moves i stopped eating i wouldnt eat a thing i dont know why i just didnt see the point i wasnt feeling hungry this lasted for about a month then my mum made me eat. About a week later my dad got really drunk he was scaring me i was 13 at this point anyway he got arrested and since then every time i go to sleep i get it happeneing all over again in  my head i wake up crying its gotten t the point where i have started self harming i dont want to be here any more please help me it scares me to go to sleep i don t knwow aht to do any more ?
Ask Sam


Hello there

Thanks for taking the time to write to me. It sounds like you have had an awful lot of stuff to cope with.

You’ve said that you are always being bullied. It’s not okay for people to bully you and you should not have to put up with it. Your school has got a responsibility to make sure you are safe and free from bullying. They should have an anti-bullying policy and it might be worth finding out what it says. There is more about this on the website You might also find it helpful to look at our Explore pages about bullying. The ChildLine message boards are also a great place to get support and see how other young people have coped with bullying. 

It sounds as though you were really close to your friend and it must be difficult to cope without her. Some people stay in touch by using email or things like Facebook or Skype. This means that even if they are far away it is still possible to have a relationship with them and get their help and support.

On top of that, your dad behaved in a way that left you feeling really scared. Sometimes when you go through something horrible or scary it comes back to you in the form of a nightmare or maybe even a flashback. It sounds like that might be happening to you. You can read more about how a bad experience can affect you on the Young Minds website.

I can hear that you have been harming yourself as a way of coping and I’m concerned to hear you say that you don’t want to be here anymore. I would never want any young person to do anything to harm themselves. I really encourage you to speak to someone if you feel you are likely to harm yourself.

You’ve been really brave in contacting me and it is great that you feel able to talk about this. I’m just wondering how you feel about talking to one of the ChildLine counsellors as well. They are there to listen and to help you look at ways of coping with everything. They will never judge you or tell you what to do. You can talk to them online using 1-2-1 chat or you can phone free on 0800 1111.

I hope this has helps and thanks for getting in touch.

Take care


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