Ask Sam letter


To Sam

My so called friend

My so called friend called me fat yesterday, I have been told this many times I try so hard to lose weight.
Ask Sam


Hi there,

Friends can be there to support you, but sometimes they can upset us with their words or actions. It can be really hurtful if it’s the people we feel close to that are putting us down.

It’s never ok for anyone to say or do something to purposely upset you. That is called bullying. Bullying can happen to anyone for no reason at all. Whether it's how we look, where we come from or what we believe in, it’s never your fault and they are wrong for doing this.

Having a conversation with your friend and talking about how their words have made you feel and how you’d like to be treated as a friend can help someone to realise the impact that their words are having. And how it’s affecting you. This could help them understand and make things better.

Not all friendships are good for us and it’s important to be honest with ourselves about that. If you no longer feel confident in the friendship then it’s ok to also look for ways to make new friends.

If people say upsetting things to you many times it can affect your confidence and self-esteem. If something is being said or done that upsets you then you have a right to speak out about this. And to get some support to help make it stop. Sometimes it can be hard to do this on your own and you might like to think about asking an adult for help to make sure this doesn’t happen again.

You can also always talk to a counsellor for support. They're always here to support you if you’d like to talk things through.

Take care,

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

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