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My Best Friend Wants To Commit Suicide


About 8 months back, my best friend told me that she has been trying to overdose alot and she has been cutting. I just kinda said 'Oh' because it broke my heart and I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs and punch a wall. I asked her why and she said that it was my fault. Ever since then I've been cutting and it doesn't help that whenever she tries to overdose, she tells me every last detail. She still won't tell me why it's my fault but she keeps asking me questions like: 'What would you do if I died?' and 'What would happen if I killed myself?'. Please I don't know what to do. One of my other friends killed herself a couple of months ago and I didn't take it well and my best friend knows what it did to me and she wants to commit suicide anyway. Whenever I ask her why she just says 'If i talk about it, then I might just pick do it’.

I need serious help, please.

Ask Sam


Hi there

Thank you for your letter, it sounds like you’ve had to hold all of this concern about your friend for such a long time. I’m glad that you are talking about it so openly now. It can be incredibly difficult knowing how to respond when a friend talks about feeling so low, it’s understandable that it felt overwhelming.

It sounds like your friend is having a really tough time and deserves to be supported, but it’s not okay for her to tell you that her problems are your fault. Making a statement like that and then refusing to explain her reasons feels really unfair. I want you to remember that you can try and help your friend with how she feels, but you are not responsible for the choices she makes.

This level of responsibility is too much for any one person to hold by themselves, no matter who they are or how old. It’s important to remember how serious an overdose is. It can cause irreversible damage and can be fatal.

It sounds like you know all too well what it’s like to lose someone through suicide, and I can see how much it affected you. I wonder if you have had any support with working through your feelings about your friend’s suicide. You might find it useful to look at the Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide website for some specific advice and information.

Sometimes it can feel like you shouldn’t tell someone what a friend has told you because you might betray their trust. Secrets are okay when they feel comfortable to keep, but when you’re worried about a friend’s safety, you’re doing the right thing by asking for help from an adult. It’s worth thinking about adults in your life who would be best to talk to and who could help support you and your friend. This could be a teacher or even someone in your family who you trust. The Epic friends website has more advice about when to share worries about a friend with someone else.

I think it would be a really good idea to talk to a ChildLine counsellor about what’s been happening with your friend. They can help you think through how you can best get support for your friend and they can help support you as well what you’ve had to go through. Call free on 0800 1111 or chat to a counsellor online.

Whatever is happening with the people in your life, what you’re feeling is always important too.

Take care


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