Ask Sam letter


To Sam

I have been having flashbacks

hi, ive been having flashbacks recently to all the bad things that have happened in my like, like my dad dying, and breaking my ankle and being in a terrorist attack, and its making me depressed. a few of my friends know but ive been crying every night and i dont want to tell my mum because there are other people i woukd rather talk to, i have began to self harm snd now its getting worse and worse, i need help

Ask Sam


Hi there

Having flashbacks can be a response to difficult things that have happened. Experiences that are difficult to cope with or are traumatic can sometimes make it harder for you to cope later on. Remember you can always get support when you're going through a tough time or coping with depression.

When someone dies you have a lot of different memories that are upsetting and stressful, it’s important to try and cope with the feelings those memories bring. It can be a time to look back at relationships and we can often feel confused about how we do cope or should feel.

There are lots of ways to relax but you may need to try different ways of coping with stress to find what works for you. There are coping strategies that will help you feel better straight away and others that will take time to practice.

Taking three slow deep breaths can help you to feel calmer when you feel anxious or scared. You can try listening to some relaxing music, writing things down in a journal and physical exercise to release tension. It’s also important to take care of yourself and stay healthy by eating well, getting a good night’s sleep and spending time with supportive and positive people.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) can make someone have flashbacks, feel depressed and have difficulty sleeping. There's more information on the Young Minds website and it’s important to see your doctor if you think you might have PTSD. We also have advice about different types of mental health issues that you may find useful.

There are lots of reasons why people self-harm and it can be a way of trying to manage painful feelings and memories. There's information on ways to cope with thoughts and urges to harm yourself. Always to remember to call 999 if you need immediate medical help at any time.

Recognising that you need help is a really big step forward. You can talk with a Childline counsellor to get more personal support.

Take care,


Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter