Need help straight away?
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
Hi there,
I can hear how difficult it has been to write to me but Im really pleased that you have managed to. Youve done very well explaining things and its really good to hear that just being able to share how youre feeling has been really helpful to you.
I can see that while you and your sister have been growing up, you've been made to feel you dont matter, and I have to say that youve done really well to see that its your family that have behaved this way and not to blame your sister.
Youve said how youve tried different ways of deal with this but they havent provided you with the love and attention that you would like and deserve. It sounds like youve learned to cope with this the best way you can - by protecting yourself from being hurt by shutting down your feelings and stopping caring about yourself. However, this has made you feel more lost and sorry for yourself which you really dont like. Its wrong that your family have made you feel like this when you are as important and worthwhile as your sister and brother. Sometimes families dont realise the impact of what theyre doing and saying so it can help to let them know how youre feeling. If you dont feel able to talk to them then some young people have said how writing a letter can really work for them - as it allows them to say everything without interruption. Also you can leave the letter with your family at a time when youre not going to be around for a while.
I can hear that because youve become so low its difficult to be positive for any length of time and you cant see that things will ever get better for you. I know that with the right help and support things can change. It can take time, a lot of hard work and a lot of faith but it can happen. Youve written to me today and this is a great first step in getting some support for yourself. Youve also said how sharing how you feel in this letter has helped you feel a bit better so I think you may find talking to one of the counsellors at ChildLine helpful too.
You are such a good writer that you may prefer to use writing to talk to a counsellor. You can do this using an online 1-2-1 chat through the ChildLine website or you can send emails once youve set up an account. It can take up to 24 hours for the counsellors to reply to emails but chat is more immediate. You can also phone up on 0800 1111 (calls are free and wont show up on bills).
I really hope you will feel able to talk to someone at ChildLine and get some support for yourself.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.