Ask Sam letter


To Sam


hey sam so i am thinking to stop cutting perminantly. i am thinking of this as my new years resolution . i found thst less thsn half the people thst make resolutions stsy with them . i really want to stay with this resolutin though it would be for the best! i  have been able to go up to three months with no scars or scratxhes. latelly i have been feeling sad. the feeling of being depressed comes and goes. there needs to be a better way.

so i am writing you this to understsnd are there ways to help stop cutting? i have heard of the butterfly project , but ended up failing that. also using ice when i want ro cut or tearing up paper. any ideas how to stop and quit getting urges to cut?
please have some ideas ? :/

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Thanks for your letter. It’s great that you were able to send me a message because asking for support is a really big step to take.

Choosing to give up cutting sounds like an important decision for you and I can hear that that you really want to make this a New Year’s resolution. It sounds like you are determined to stop completely, but it's okay to take things one day at a time and not put too much pressure on yourself.

Self-harming can be hard to give up as the feeling you get from it can become addictive. It’s been a huge achievement for you to go three months without cutting. When planning to stop, it can be good to try a few ideas because different methods work for different people. Some ideas might work for a short time and others much longer.

I know that some young people find it helpful to keep a diary of what‘s happening for them on the days they want to cut and what feelings they experience. Being aware of the feelings you get when you want to cut can make it easier to see other ways to create that feeling. For example, if angry you could do something energetic (dancing, exercise, or hitting a pillow) to get those feelings out. For more thoughts, have a look at our page on self-harm coping techniques.

From what you’ve said, it sounds like you started to self-harm to cope with feeling sad and depressed. It often helps to talk through those feelings as that can take away the need to cut. Talking can also help people find solutions to the things concerning them.

Sometimes when people are feeling down it can help for them to take extra care of themselves. Perhaps you could spend more time doing things that you enjoy, things that make you happy, and activities that help you relax.

Remember you can always speak with a ChildLine counsellor. ChildLine is safe place to talk and get support. You can do that on the phone, in a 1-2-1 chat or by email. Remember that you can also get more support and advice from other young people by checking out the message boards.

Take care,


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