Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Being mistaken as a girl often

In skl I often get mistaken as a girl, I'm a boy though. I even wear a male blazer for skl but people still think I'm a girl. I have a feminine face and I'm petite (small) with a girly voice. Lots of people in my year group ask if I'm a boy or a girl or they would just use the term she/her which makes me kinda angry though I do correct them politely at the end.

Please help

Ask Sam


Hi there,

When someone judges you for how you look or sound it can really affect your self-esteem. But it’s wrong and it’s not your fault. No one should make personal comments that might make you feel uncomfortable. When someone says something to hurt your feelings, this is bullying.

It’s important to remember that as we grow up we all develop differently. Everyone looks and sounds different. This is what makes us individual - we are all unique in our own way.

It seems like the comments that people at school have made have left you feeling angry. Handling it politely and correcting them shows a lot of maturity, remember that there’s lots of ways to deal with your anger.

If people are making you feel uncomfortable at school it can help to talk to a teacher or another trusted adult in your life for some support. Any behaviour that you leaves you feeling upset is never okay, it's not something you have to put up with.

If you’re not ready to talk to someone you know you can talk to one of our counsellors. They’re here to listen and support you. You can also post on the message boards to get advice from other young people.

Take care,


Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter