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To Sam

After abortion thoughts

I am 17 years old and was 10 weeks pregnant. One of the main reasons why I thought abortion was the best option was because im a complete mess and have been for a couple of months. I am barley holding on and I literally been wanting to die and obviously the other reasons being im not ready. After the abortion I just kept thinking if I made the right choice and just had so many questions. It is now very late at night, its about to be 5am and I cant stop thinking about it. I kinda regret it I keep thinking of the ultrasound picture I saw and Its just crazy to me that I couldve had a kid. Someone that was a part of me. And I would never be alone. Im just so sad and disappointed in myself and dont know if i made the right choice.

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Sam

Hi there,

Deciding to have an abortion or continue with a pregnancy is a big decision to make and so the feelings about it might not disappear straight away. There are lots of reasons someone might choose to have an abortion but at the end of the day it is your decision to make. Whatever happens, it's okay to feel however you feel and to make the best decision you can at the time.

There are many reasons you might choose to have an abortion - mental health, money worries, school or career reasons or just because you don't want a baby. It's your body and you get to decide what happens to it. However, no matter what your reasons are or how sure you feel, you still might have a lot of difficult emotions to cope with after you’ve made your decision.

Some people feel grief, as they do when someone dies. Some people feel worried they made the wrong choice. Others feel happy and glad that they are not pregnant. These are all okay to feel - it doesn't make you a bad person if you feel relieved afterwards and it doesn't mean you made the wrong decision if you feel sad.

Whenever you go through a big life event, it's important to take a step back from everything and look after yourself. Get some support - there is help available for you and you don't have to go through this alone. Marie Stopes offer support both before and after getting an abortion and have advice on practical things you can do to cope. If your family and friends are supportive, try talking to them. No matter what, Childline are here for you and our counsellors can be there to listen anytime you want to talk.

I'm glad you sent me this letter, I hope you get the support you deserve.

Take care,

Sam

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