Ask Sam letter


To Sam

Starting my period - Who to tell?

Hello Sam.

I have started my period today and I am so embarresed and afraid to tell someone. I really want to keep it a secret.

My mum is the type of person that if something happens, she will tell ANYBODY. She had told me that having periods is normal. But I seriously don't want to tell her.

I feel like I have to tell her to get support, pads etc.

I haven't got a older sibling, I have my dad, but there is no way I'm telling him.

Is there any advice? What should I do? Thank you.

Ask Sam


Hi there,

Starting your period can be scary and it's normal to worry about what might happen. But periods are a normal and natural part of growing up for any girl - it’s nothing you should feel embarrassed about.

Talking to people about things to do with our bodies and puberty can feel really uncomfortable and hard to do, and I can hear that you’re feeling particularly worried about talking it through with your Mum.

If you were to speak to your Mum, it’s okay for you to ask for this to be kept private between just the two of you. If you prefer, you might feel more comfortable with the idea of speaking to another female relative you trust.

Remember that most women have gone through this experience themselves, so there's a good chance they'll understand that it can feel embarrassing.

You might also find it helpful to ask other young people about their experiences, by posting a message in the puberty message boards.

You can always talk to a Childline counsellor about how it feels now that you've started your periods or any other concerns that you have.

Take care


Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter