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To Sam

Shaving

I am a 14 male and I have a lot of facial hair. I started shaving about a year ago. My parents don’t know that I started shaving because I found a unused razor pack in the bathroom and have been using them ever since. I took them because I was embarrased at school and when my dad didn’t bring it up that I had to start shaving I had to take matters into my own hands. Then one day I mustered up the courage to ask him to teach me how to shave, and to my suprize, he said no. I have asked him multiple times now and he has just kept saying no. I don’t know how much longer I can go by keeping this a secret from him and how mich longer those razors will last. I need to know how to ask to teach me how to shave without being embarressed

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Sam

Hi there,

When you reach puberty you may start seeing more hair growing in different places on your body. For men, one of those places is on your face and at first it can look different to how it looks when an adult grows facial hair. If you want to start shaving, then you'll need either an electric shaver or a razor, and someone to show you how to do it.

Shaving your face can be tricky and if you use a razor, you’re likely to make a few mistakes at first. Learning takes time but you might learn quicker if you have someone show you how to do it. If your dad can’t show you, is there another male member of your family you could ask? If there isn’t anyone else you'd feel comfortable asking, there are likely be some tutorials online. Try looking for videos of how to shave - you may be able to do it yourself this way.

One thing you won't be able to do yourself is buy razors because you need to be 18-years-old to buy razor blades. There are two alternatives if your parents won't buy razors for you. The first is, again, to ask another adult you trust if they can get them for you. The other option is to buy an electric shaver as these don't have an age restriction on them. The problem with this is that they can start at £20-30, so are quite expensive which isa problem if you don't have any money.

If none of these options are available to you then you could still try talking to your dad again. Maybe you could ask what his reasons are for not wanting you to shave. Once you have heard his reasons you can then try to put your own reasons forward for needing to shave. It can be scary to stand up to parents like this but talking about it with someone else first can help. You could try practising with a Childline counsellor first. You can talk online or but I would recommend talking on the phone. If you’ve already talked it through out loud with someone on the phone, it might make it easier to to talk to your dad.

Thanks for sharing this problem with me, I hope this advice has helped.

Take care,

Sam

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