Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

Masturbation

Is masturbating bad because i feel like im the olny person who does it. Also i feel a bit wierd saying this, but is it the same feeling you get when you have sex?

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

I get a lot of letters from young people who are worried about masturbation. The first thing to know is that it's okay to want to do it and it's also okay if you don't.

Masturbation is not bad or wrong and is completely normal for anyone to do it, no matter what age, gender, sexuality or cultural background they come from. Masturbation is something most people do around the time they reach puberty. Changes in our body start to give us sexual urges and masturbation is a completely normal and safe way to explore those urges.

Masturbation should be a private thing you do, so it's not really anybody else's business, but you're certainly not the only person who does it.

As for how it feels, this is something that only you can really decide for yourself. Both masturbation and sex will feel different for everybody. Some people might like masturbation but not sex - others will like both, or neither. It really is going to be something you will discover when you are ready and in your own time.

I hope this helps. If you want to ask any more questions then get in touch with us.

Sam

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter