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To Sam

I'm so ugly it hurts

I suffer from pigmentation mainly on my upper lip, I have tried everything from lightening cream, to home remedies such as cucumber and foundation that suppose to cover it but nothing seems to be working. Everyone I know points it out that it looks like I have a mistach, I feel like its ruineing my life I can't go out without having a scarf over my face I refuse to have my picture taken and a lot of my family have the pleasure of taunting me about it, I suffer from bdd ( body dysmorphic disorder ) and no one is helping I hate the way I look I have considered laser treatment but I don't know if that is a good idea? Please help me, thank you
Ask Sam


Hi there,

It’s really good that you’ve decided to talk about these feelings. It sounds like things other people have said to you have made you feel more self-conscious. It’s not ok for anyone to tease you about your appearance.

I’m concerned to hear that your family are taunting you about how you look. When they are making negative comments about you and saying things to make you feel bad, it is a type of emotional abuse. It sounds as though people may be bullying you about this. If this happens at school teachers have a responsibility to try and prevent it, so talking to a teacher might be a good idea. Have a look at our bullying page for more ideas about how to deal with this.

Lots of young people tell us they feel unhappy about the way they look, or have a certain part of their body that they feel self-conscious about. If you have a look at the body Image message board you will see messages from people who have similar feelings, and read about how people cope with this. You can also read more about this on our how you look page. We also have ideas about how to build your self esteem.

Some people find it helps to make a list of things that they like about themselves – they don’t always have to do with your appearance, it could be something you’re good at or a quality like kindness, or patience.

You have been disappointed when you have tried to find ways to change your appearance. I can’t give you advice about laser treatment as I’m not medically trained. It’s possible that there may be suggestions online that are actually dangerous, so it’s important to get medical advice before trying anything else. I’m wondering if your Body Dysmorphic Disorder has been professionally diagnosed. A doctor may be able to tell you more about support that is available so have a think about visiting your doctor.

You can also talk more with a ChildLine counsellor online or on the phone about how you’re feeling, and possible options that you have. Thanks again for your letter.

Take care,

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