Ask Sam letter

Hi there,

The way we think about ourselves is often because we’re worried about what other people think. Having a cultural or religious practice or clothing that’s a different to people around you might make you feel like you're sticking out. This can make you feel under pressure about how you look. Try to remember that everyone’s a little different and there's no right or wrong way to dress.

Wearing a hijab should be a choice you make and that you do for yourself. It's not okay for anyone to force you to wear one, though there might be a lot of pressure to from people like your family who want to keep their cultural identity alive. If you don't like the hijab it's okay to say you don't want to wear one but I understand that for some people this might cause some problems.

If you’re being left out because of your hijab then this is bullying. Nobody has the right to bully you for any reason - including how you look or your cultural background. If people say or do anything to make you feel excluded, it's okay to talk to someone at school about how you're feeling to see if there’s anything they can do to help.

Learning to love yourself is not easy and can take a lot of time and effort. If you feel bad about yourself to begin with it's like climbing uphill to get to a place where you can feel good. If you're able to be confident about yourself, you can find friends who love you for who you are and it becomes easier to ignore what other people think.

A good place to start is to write down a good thing about yourself every day. Thinking positively about yourself can lead to positive feelings and actions that improve your self-confidence. Try getting some sticky-notes and putting them on mirrors or in your bedroom so that the good things you write are there all the time.

I hope this has helped but remember that Childline is here 24 hours, every day. There's always someone here to listen if you need to talk to a counsellor.

Thanks for sharing this with me. Take care.

Sam