Ask Sam letter


To Sam

i hate the way i look

i dont like anything about myself and wish i looked different i know i should accept myself but when i look at other people it makes me fell worse. I keep thinking that even when i grow older i'll still be ugly, i'm also really tall and don't seem to fit in with everybody else.
Ask Sam



Thanks for contacting me. I can hear how uncomfortable you feel about yourself, contacting to get support for this is a positive step to take.

Self acceptance is accepting who we are but very often we can put too much emphasis on what others think about us, or what we think they think about us. Sometimes all around us there can be lots of focus on outward appearance; we can forget that who we are on the inside is equally if not more important.

It sounds like you know you should accept yourself but right now it’s difficult for you, especially when you look at others; when we look around us we can think that everyone is self-confident, and forget that often people struggle with the same feelings of self-doubt.

We are all different and being different is not a negative thing. However when we are doubting ourselves it can change the way we view things, making us see all the similarities that others have and not the differences.

Self acceptance is an on-going process, you can build your self esteem by writing post-it notes saying positive comments and placing them around your room; the more you read these the more you will start to believe it. You could also write down the things you have achieved, the talents and skill you have, and positive things people have said about you, when you’re feeling low you can read these to encourage yourself. The Explore page on building confidence and self esteem has more information.

You might also find it helpful to contact ChildLine by phone or sign up for an account and use 1-2-1 chat so you can talk through your feelings with a ChildLine counsellor in more detail.

Take care,


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