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To Sam

I had a phase

a while back, I thought I might be bisexual. I looked online to see if it was normal. I saw that it was normal to worry about my sexuality at this age (13). Id been feeling pretty uncomfortable with my best friend and I thought it might be because I liked her. In the spur of the moment, I told her. This ruined our friendship. And now my sister has found out. She's not happy with it and she won't listen when I tell her that it was a phase.
Ask Sam


Hi there,

You’re right - worrying about your sexuality is normal. It can happen at any age, but usually during puberty people begin experience sexual feelings or emotions for the first time. And this can make them question their sexuality.

Some people know when they are young whether they fancy boys, girls or both sexes. For other people it can be confusing and can take time to work out. You shouldn’t need to feel under any pressure to rush into deciding how you feel. It’s okay that you feel like you’ve changed your mind about being bisexual. And there’s no need to put a label on your sexuality unless you want to.

It was really brave of you to talk to your best friend about how you felt. Sometimes talking about these kind of feelings can change the friendship. But it doesn’t have to be forever. If your friend is finding it difficult now you have told her this, try giving her some space and making sure she knows you still want to be friends.

Family relationships can be difficult as everyone has their own ideas and opinions. It sounds like your sister isn’t being supportive and this can be upsetting. Speaking to your sister might help. Pick a time she isn’t busy and explain how her not listening is making you feel. This might help her to understand more.

Have a look on the message boards to see how other young people are coping in similar situations. And remember, you can always speak to a ChildLine counsellor.

Take care,

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